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Rodney Lacroix
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Things Go Wrong For Me (when life hands you lemons, add vodka): Hysterically true tales (COMEDY, SHORT STORIES) Kindle Edition

by Rodney Lacroix (Author), Ross Cavins (Editor) Format: Kindle Edition
3.9 out of 5 stars 210 ratings
FINALIST - 2013 Next Generation Indie Book Awards (Humor/Humour) FINALIST - 2013 National Indie Excellence Book Awards (Humor/Humour) Think you've got it bad? You ain't seen nothing yet. Murphy's Law, meet Rodney's Law. If it can go wrong, it has already happened to Rodney Lacroix in the worst, most comedic way humanly possible. And you'll find all of those stories right here, in full-color detail, right in this book. Things Go Wrong For Me (when life hands you lemons, add vodka) is a memoir of sorts, a road map of Rodney Lacroix's haywire life thus far. If you think you're having a bad day, this book is a great reminder that it can always get worse. This is typically at Rodney Lacroix's expense, sadly for him. There's no doubt, if you enjoy snorting milk through your nose, and you're drinking milk right now ... you're going to love this book.
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  1. Print length
    385 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publication date
    April 27, 2016
  4. File size
    8.2 MB
  5. Page Flip
    Enabled
  6. Word Wise
    Enabled
  7. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
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Editorial Reviews

Review

"A hysterical book written by a man with no filter, a vasectomy and a name like 'Rod?' I'm all over it."- Jenny McCarthy, NYT Bestselling Author, TV personality, Cougar Raper
"Rodney Lacroix has created a wonderfully hilarious book, and also has a very fun name to say out loud."- Jenny Lawson, Author of NYT Bestsellers, Let's Pretend This Never Happened and Furiously Happy
"Rodney draws you in with vibrant diction and illustrations. Before you know it your ass will be numb because you've read "Things Go Wrong for Me", cover-to-cover, on the toilet. Which is the only acceptable place to read it since you'll be pissing yourself with laugh-out-loud hilarity!"- Bo Sellers, Comedienne and Actress
"If things go wrong in your life, buying this book may be the first right thing you do. If nothing else, your life will feel right by comparison alone. Truly an awesomely funny book. (If Rodney serves chocolate at his book signing.. avoid it...)"- David M Beach, Actor / Comedian / Host of the LowDown
"Rodney's book is absolutely, hands-down hilarious. And now I hate him because his book is funnier than mine and for that, he must die. That sound you hear is his ex-wife cheering ..."- Suzy Soro, Comedian and Author, Celebrity sTalker
"As a middle-aged woman, I can safely declare that Rodney's Things Go Wrong For Me is targeted to pre-pubescent boys with a penchant for juvenile delinquency and a fistful of Twinkies. Two words: I loved it."
- Margaret Andrews, Author of Nanny Goats in Panties and Sticky Readers

About the Author

Rodney Lacroix is a comedian, father of two amazing kids, reluctant 40-hour-a-week software engineer and best-selling author. In 2013, Rodney was awarded an NGI Book Awards Medal for his memoir, "Things Go Wrong for Me." This beautiful medal is currently on display around his neck because he has not taken it off since receiving it. Also he's not very humble. 
 
Rodney firmly believes that fabricating grandiose tales about one's self makes a person more impressive. That's exactly what he told Playgirl Magazine when they did a four-page nude spread of him.
 
It's probably best you don't believe anything Rodney says.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B01EW9ZI24
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ RCG Publishing
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ April 27, 2016
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 8.2 MB
  • Simultaneous device usage ‏ : ‎ Unlimited
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Not Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 385 pages
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0982772034
  • Page Flip ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Customer Reviews:
    3.9 out of 5 stars 210 ratings

About the author

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Rodney Lacroix

Rodney Lacroix

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Full content visible, double tap to read brief content.

Rodney Lacroix is just one of those guys. He's one of those guys that make you say, "You know, I'm glad I'm not THAT guy."

THAT? That's Rodney Lacroix.

Rodney Lacroix lives in southern New Hampshire. He is the proud biological father of two amazing children and step-ological father of two stepamazing stepchildren.

He also likes to invent terms.

Rodney Lacroix has been writing about his misadventures for years. He's done stand-up comedy, emceed charity events and has hung out with many celebrities.

Rodney's books have won him multiple humor awards and have appeared on international best-seller lists. He is worshipped in most third-world countries and is known as "El Chupacabra.' Perhaps you've heard of him.

Maybe you shouldn't believe anything he says. DO read his books, though. He's hysterical.

Customer reviews

3.9 out of 5 stars
210 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book hilarious with nonstop laughter, and one mentions it made them pee their pants from laughing. Moreover, the book is easy to read and leaves readers thinking about their own childhood. The artwork receives mixed feedback, with some praising the awesome drawings while one notes poorly photoshopped pictures. Additionally, the writing style and value for money receive positive reviews.

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84 customers mention "Humor"65 positive19 negative

Customers find the book hilarious, with nonstop laughter throughout and genuinely funny stories, with one customer mentioning it was so funny it made them pee their pants.

"...It sucks. So glad I grew into a sexy, thin adult. The match.com stuff is hilarious and the drawings are awesome...." Read more

"This is a very funny book. I laughed out loud in the first half. The second half was humorous, but not as good as the beginning...." Read more

"...Dude is hilarious. Way funnier than he is on Twitter. I laughed until tears rolled down my cheeks...." Read more

"...Some of these stories are genuinely funny. Some are just okay...." Read more

32 customers mention "Readability"29 positive3 negative

Customers find the book enjoyable and easy to read, describing it as a great light-hearted read. One customer mentions it's fun enough to read before bed, while another notes the Kindle version is well done.

"...Back to the point, this book is great. Really great. I could relate to being a fat kid. It sucks. So glad I grew into a sexy, thin adult...." Read more

"...Rodney's book was TOTALLY worth reading on the toilet- worth taking a "kindle" into the loo..." Read more

"...Now all kidding aside the book is fantastic and I will continue to support Rodney in all he does..." Read more

"...Like his website, the book made me LOLCATS (I'm still working on the Internet "lingo") and ROTFLMAO (Roll on the Flour Licking Myself And Oprah)...." Read more

10 customers mention "Heartwarming story"10 positive0 negative

Customers find the book heartwarming, with one mentioning it's filled with little vignettes from the author's life and another noting it's great in-flight entertainment.

"...This memoir-of-sorts is filled with little vignettes from his life, from his childhood as a fat kid, his vasectomy, and his life post-divorce...." Read more

"...who says what he feels and thats it, this book is an amzing collection of stories that not only made me laugh but made me feel amazing about..." Read more

"...Hilarious and inappropriate, but underneath, a heartwarming tribute from a guy that just loves his kids. Highly recommended!" Read more

"...I laughed from page one to the end. Childhood memories, with so many touches of how it really is, adult situations of child rearing and divorce all..." Read more

7 customers mention "Value for money"7 positive0 negative

Customers find the book worth the money, with one mentioning it's worth an hour or two of their time.

"...Please forgive me. Turns out, the book was totally worth the almost $3 and the time it took me to read it. Dude is hilarious...." Read more

"...best medicine and I can honestly say that I am feeling like a million bucks after reading this...." Read more

"...pointing pictures and jokes out to others made this WELL worth the purchase...." Read more

"...Both are beautifully done. DEFINITELY well worth the money and the time to read it. It is my new favorite book...." Read more

8 customers mention "Artwork quality"5 positive3 negative

Customers have mixed opinions about the artwork in the book, with some finding the drawings awesome, while another customer notes that the images are not ideal on Kindle.

"...The match.com stuff is hilarious and the drawings are awesome. Who doesn't love a man with multiple talents - if you can call them talents...." Read more

"...(and his odd, poorly photoshopped pictures are included) which means that fonts and font sizes jump around a bit...." Read more

"...And in addition, a whole lot of pictures and drawings, some used to illustrate the gags in the text, others funny on their own...." Read more

"...I loved the amazing artwork and how well each picture reflected the story being told...." Read more

8 customers mention "Writing style"5 positive3 negative

Customers have mixed opinions about the writing style of the book.

"...His comedy style is fantastic, his writing comes from real life interactions and every single page of the book is a literal LOL...." Read more

"...The writing felt contrived and heavily embellished...." Read more

"...Excellent, fun writing!!" Read more

"I thoroughly enjoyed this book. The stories were so easy to read and relatable that it was like hanging out with a friend...." Read more

Top reviews from the United States

  • Little Whovian
    5.0 out of 5 stars Short, sweet and hilarious... like your c*** (if you sprinkle sugar on it)! Amazon doesn't allow profanity... oops. :-p
    Reviewed in the United States on February 17, 2014
    Verified Purchase
    The only bad part of this book is the end... I was thinking, "wait, what, it's over? Nooo!" I want more. I love this book. I laughed, I cried, I got a sudden craving for a 3 musketeers bar. I also learned some stuff... for example, I was under the impression that men could not ejaculate after having a vasectomy. How wrong was I? Also, as a single mom to a preschooler, I love the ideas for lying to your kids (I can't wait to tell my daughter that raisins are people). I read this book in one sitting and was laughing pretty much the entire time (which confused my daughter who kept looking over at my iPad to see what was so funny and seeing only a screen full of words she can't read). I am left wondering if shaving your balls is harder than shaving lady parts. Because, man, that is not easy. I guess we'll never know. Unless we ask a person who has both parts or someone who had a sex change, maybe? I really want to know.

    Back to the point, this book is great. Really great. I could relate to being a fat kid. It sucks. So glad I grew into a sexy, thin adult. The match.com stuff is hilarious and the drawings are awesome. Who doesn't love a man with multiple talents - if you can call them talents. But seriously, I hope to find more books by Mr. Lacroix. As a writer and someone who has read more books than she can count, I am not one to hand out compliments so easily. I honestly would not have even read this if it had not been free to download and if I had not just spent hours reading a quantitative statistics book. This was exactly the break my brain needed before going back to studying. I will be on the lookout for more of this. Because sometimes a girl just needs a good, no-thinking-required laugh. :) <~ Smiley faces make everything better.

    Edit: I see the book is no longer free to download so I wanted to add that it is totally worth paying for. Buy it. You won't regret it.
    2 people found this helpful
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  • Elizabeth
    4.0 out of 5 stars Best read with Kindle Fire
    Reviewed in the United States on December 15, 2013
    Verified Purchase
    This is a very funny book. I laughed out loud in the first half. The second half was humorous, but not as good as the beginning. In the very beginning I noticed there were hints of Dave Barry (yes, he likes to name bands, too). Just a warning - this book has lots of pictures and diagrams that are best viewed on a device that handles color. I have a plain old kindle and some of the diagrams weren't as clear in grey and black. I used the app on my phone to look at pictures that really caught my interest.
    One person found this helpful
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  • Roxanne
    5.0 out of 5 stars Totally worth it!
    Reviewed in the United States on January 16, 2013
    Verified Purchase
    I started following @Moooooog35 on Twitter a few months ago because someone re-tweeted something he said and he seemed funny. I like to follow random funny people. I hope some of their wit will rub off on me. Because I only pretend to be funny.

    So Rodney (That's his real name. I didn't know he had a real name.) wrote a book called Things Go Wrong For Me and I decided to give it a read. It was on sale for $2.99, so what did I have to lose? Besides almost $3. And the time it took me to read it.

    I let it sit on my digital shelf for a while because I had more important things to do. I don't know what they were, but I'm sure they were very important.

    I finally read it. And I read it in two days. I would have read it in one day, but I got busy doing other important things.

    I'm sorry Rodney. Feeding my kid and going work are slightly more important than reading your book. Please forgive me.

    Turns out, the book was totally worth the almost $3 and the time it took me to read it. Dude is hilarious. Way funnier than he is on Twitter. I laughed until tears rolled down my cheeks.

    This memoir-of-sorts is filled with little vignettes from his life, from his childhood as a fat kid, his vasectomy, and his life post-divorce. The childhood story about the toboggan is probably the funniest. There are pictures and diagrams and really crappy drawings that add to the ridiculous humor of each story.

    I really don't want to say a lot, because if it's unexpected, it's totally funnier.

    I didn't know Rodney has a blog. I just knew his humor from Twitter. There is so much more hilarity to ensue.

    Want to laugh until you pee your pants? Read this book with a full bladder.

    What laugh a lot but still be able to control your bladder? Read this book right after you pee. Or, better yet, while you're on the toilet. Totally makes sense.

    Offended by vulgar language or pictures of male genitalia with smiley faces? Don't read this book.
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  • Madame Leota
    3.0 out of 5 stars ok for a blog-to-book
    Reviewed in the United States on March 12, 2013
    Verified Purchase
    I downloaded this for free and thought it was funny enough to recommend to people, but once the freebie was over, I had to change my mind. I can't honestly recommend that anyone buy this book.

    This book is a blog-to-book translation and honestly there aren't many changes. In fact, a lot of the formatting used online is exactly the same (and his odd, poorly photoshopped pictures are included) which means that fonts and font sizes jump around a bit. I didn't dislike it, but it didn't look nice for the Kindle format. I was frankly surprised that there were no publication issues with him using photos from the internet, but hey - I'm no lawyer.

    Some of these stories are genuinely funny. Some are just okay. The vasectomy story was one of the so-so ones, mostly because it was originally several blog entries... if it had been condensed into a single chapter, I think most people would have liked it better. Considering that it has some hearty recommendations from fellow bloggers who are themselves very funny, I kind of expected more. Maybe if I was a regular reader of his site, I would have more appreciation.
    3 people found this helpful
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  • Mary
    1.0 out of 5 stars DOES HUMOR HAVE TO BE DISGUSTING?
    Reviewed in the United States on April 3, 2013
    Verified Purchase
    Reviews were great, so I downloaded the book. I started reading it, and noted the use of bad language -- but it seemed funny -- so I continued on -- as long as I could. After awhile it wasn't funny. I have low tolerance for the "F" word and the name "Jesus" and sexual innuendos. It was funny -- until it just got more unpleasant than funny -- so I gave it up about an 8th of the way through. What is that about people who can only be funny by using bad language -- lack of vocabulary or intelligence or creativity?
    22 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

  • Mutts
    5.0 out of 5 stars So funny
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on December 21, 2012
    Verified Purchase
    "To mind the inside of a book is to entertain one's self with the forced product of another man's brain. Now I think a man of quality and breeding may be much amused with the natural sprouts of his own." --Lord Foppington in the Relapse

    I laughed.... on a packed train with everyone looking at me like I was a pickle. It was worth it! I enjoyed this book and so will you.
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  • avid reader
    2.0 out of 5 stars OMG But the cartoons aren't that bad...
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 11, 2013
    Verified Purchase
    I've given this two stars because I realize there must be people out there who think that books must contain pictures, preferably cartoons, or they're not real books which contain only words, which are made up of letters of the alphabet, which are difficult to read unless you point at each one. If you're one of those people,then enjoy this 'book', otherwise find something for your Kindle which will reward all your efforts in learning to associate one letter with another to form words and then, even later on, sentences, paragraphs, chapters, and - yay! finally - real books!
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  • baz62
    3.0 out of 5 stars readable
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on April 9, 2013
    Verified Purchase
    Was or is not quite as i thought it would be, slightly dissapointed, but for free, is ok like a read on a train journey, passes the time, but not gripping
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  • RogerB
    1.0 out of 5 stars Total rubbish
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on March 11, 2013
    Verified Purchase
    I don't think this book merits 1 star. i don't normally give up on books but I stopped reading it after 20 pages. Juvenile humour (not always a bad thing) but boring, like reading teenagers Facebook.
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  • Hemeloid
    1.0 out of 5 stars What a complete pile of poo
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on March 18, 2014
    Verified Purchase
    Just rubbish - stopped trying to find anything to like after 20 pages.

    Don't bother - really! Can't believe anybody bothered to publish it.
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