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Flawed (Gamer Girls Book 1) Kindle Edition

4.6 4.6 out of 5 stars 1,403 ratings

The last thing a broken girl needs is perfection.

Love isn't something Dez has time for. Simply staying alive is too much work. Even worse, the thing trying to get her is something she can't outrun: her own dark thoughts. Three years after the incident, she's only getting worse. Even the thought of casually brushing up against another person triggers her panic attacks, yet everyone says she should be fine.

They call her a survivor, but this feels more like a downward spiral - until a random encounter brings her face to face with the one person who might understand. Chance needs a miracle, and he's decided she's the only thing that can save his crumbling game company. Her, the broken girl with way too many issues.

She agrees to help but has three conditions. First, no one will touch her - ever. Second, no drug tests, because she won't pass. Third, when she's done, he won't try to stop her from quitting. Those are her rules, and to Dez, this isn't just a game.

Except he has his own problem. Chance needs contact to feel whole, and she can't handle the idea of being touched. There's no way this situation can work. Plus, if her secrets come out, she won't be the miracle he needs.

But can her flaws finally help?
Or is this game over?


The Gamer Girls series features strong women and the men who love them. Knowledge about gaming and/or gamer culture is not necessary to enjoy this story. Graphic language and situations that are suitable for a mature audience are included. FLAWED is a standalone novel that moves forward a larger story.

Sensitivity Warning: There are some situations that may be triggers for some readers, please check the 'Sensitivity Warning' page at the beginning of the book for further details.

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Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B01GQSMZW0
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Spotted Horse Productions; 2nd edition (June 30, 2016)
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ June 30, 2016
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 1.2 MB
  • Simultaneous device usage ‏ : ‎ Unlimited
  • Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Not Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 520 pages
  • Page numbers source ISBN ‏ : ‎ 172090281X
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.6 4.6 out of 5 stars 1,403 ratings

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Customer reviews

4.6 out of 5 stars
1,403 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers enjoyed the engaging storyline and found it relatable. They appreciated the well-developed characters and their openness to each other. The writing quality was praised as impressive and the author's best work. Customers felt a genuine emotional connection with the characters and their struggles. The story felt realistic and honest, bringing them to tears and shattered them.

AI-generated from the text of customer reviews

89 customers mention "Storyline"85 positive4 negative

Customers enjoy the storyline. They find the book well-written, absorbing, and fun to read. Readers are excited to continue the series and appreciate the strong protagonists and unusual plot.

"...it, it was different and while I don’t know all the terms it was a fun read too. It was great seeing Dez’s growth. Can’t wait for more." Read more

"...are such a large focus of the story, they don't overshadow the amazing plot and characters! I've never read something so well done!..." Read more

"...The story itself was intriguing...." Read more

"...strength in things that others would never recover from, and the story just flows...." Read more

74 customers mention "Enthralling story"67 positive7 negative

Customers enjoy the engaging story. They find the premise relatable and the writing well-done. The story touches on many social issues and is thought-provoking. Readers are hooked from the first chapter and enjoy the love story within the story.

"...for creating a book I couldn't put down, but second tackling such hard topics like rape and recovery from rape and kidnapping...." Read more

"I enjoyed what this book taught me about gamer culture. I also appreciated how the authors handled discussing the rape that occurred...." Read more

"...The characters are all beautifuly dynamic and imperfect. They are real on a level that many are not...." Read more

"...The writing is great, the book's engaging and shot to my favorites list within a few chapters. An example:..." Read more

48 customers mention "Character development"45 positive3 negative

Customers find the characters well-developed and believable. They appreciate the strong protagonists and their openness to each other. Readers also like the coping mechanisms the characters use.

"...It is so well written and I've never met more well-rounded developed characters! I'm in love with like four characters already lol...." Read more

"...The characters are all beautifuly dynamic and imperfect. They are real on a level that many are not...." Read more

"...through the series and know the outcome, I'm still so drawn into the story and characters. Re-reading the whole series again!" Read more

"...The characters are well developed and, for the most part, believable. I was invested in their stories and felt for their struggles...." Read more

34 customers mention "Writing quality"27 positive7 negative

Customers praise the writing quality of the book. They find it well-written and relatable. The editing is also praised. Some readers consider it the author's best work, with gaming experience. Overall, they describe the book as well-written and engaging.

"...It is so well written and I've never met more well-rounded developed characters! I'm in love with like four characters already lol...." Read more

"...Despite what she's been through, she's bold, brassy, and has a veneer of unstoppable that she hides behind, while she heals and finds herself with..." Read more

"I liked the premise and the writing was well done. However, for me personally, the 3rd person pov was hard to get invested in...." Read more

"...It’s probably my favorite book Auryn has written and I almost missed it...." Read more

29 customers mention "Emotional content"29 positive0 negative

Customers find the book has an emotional connection that transcends physical boundaries. They feel for the characters' struggles and appreciate their strength to continue. The story is about acceptance and loving oneself, with a focus on mental or emotional issues. Readers mention the book makes them feel many emotions and shed tears.

"...Her struggles and her strength and will to continue on is so endearing...." Read more

"...The authors dealt with a heavy topic with grace and understanding and I can’t wait to read the rest of the series." Read more

"...You can’t help but love all the characters. There are so many supportive people that you just grow to love as you read...." Read more

"Full of triggers but raw and real and full of healing too. Not for the weak reader. Heck trigger warnings before you read...." Read more

17 customers mention "Feel"17 positive0 negative

Customers find the book's characters realistic and believable. They describe it as honest and dark, but not for those looking for a feel-good book.

"...The characters are all beautifuly dynamic and imperfect. They are real on a level that many are not...." Read more

"...Life's hard sometimes, and it's not always easy to read, but it feels real, ugly life written beautifully...." Read more

"...The characters are well developed and, for the most part, believable. I was invested in their stories and felt for their struggles...." Read more

"...I bought them for a few reasons. The writing is superb. It felt real and as if I was a part of it. I'm a veteran...." Read more

17 customers mention "Heartbreaking story"12 positive5 negative

Customers find the story heartbreaking and realistic. They appreciate the portrayal of psychological aspects of extreme trauma and how Dez grew out of her worst. The book brings them to tears and shatters their hearts, with no glossing over of details.

"...It was explained so thoroughly. The story broke my heart. So many points hit home. Nothing was glossed over...." Read more

"...This focuses more on the aftermath, the trauma and the coping mechanisms that the characters deal with...." Read more

"This book was awesome, though also contained tragedy...." Read more

"...But this book was such an amazing read and so worth the tears I spilled...." Read more

16 customers mention "Gaming content"16 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the book's gaming content. They find the video game concept interesting and relatable, dealing with real-life situations and challenges in the gaming world. The story is complex and you can relate to the characters. Overall, customers find the book relevant and thoughtful.

"...It was great seeing Dez’s growth. Can’t wait for more." Read more

"...I think they generally did a good job of using context to clarify references that non-gamers wouldn’t get but having the kindle version where I..." Read more

"...It sounds like it would be interesting to play." Read more

"...It dealt with tough topics and violence. The gaming theme was spot on but I would have liked to see more romantic banter." Read more

Top reviews from the United States

  • Reviewed in the United States on November 23, 2020
    This book was awesome, though also contained tragedy. Though we don’t see what happens to Dez when she is abducted, we do learn more about what happens within the story.

    When we first meet Dez after that time in her life, she is nothing like she was. She’s covered in game tattoos, she’s also an addict, tossing back pills to cope with the mental scars from her abduction.

    Chance, the guy who talked to Dez before her abduction randomly finds her in a Home Depot. Oddest place, but it worked for them, and it worked for him. She got to keep her habit, and a place to live if she could help him with her game when the guy she recommended tells Chance she’s better, and he’s too busy.

    They develop a somewhat unconventional relationship. Now typically I do not enjoy reading about the H banging another person who isn’t the FMC, but this worked based on their flaws.

    Chance is a sex addict and needs touch to cope with feeling invisible or forgotten. Dez needs to not touch any one ever. They are both attracted to each other that they slowly develop a relationship, even going to far as Dez picking out his conquests. It weirded me out the first time before their agreement, but afterward I became to understand it. She couldn’t touch him and he needs it, they were both getting their needs fulfilled. My main issue is not letting the OW know that she was there for their kink so to speak. That bugged me.

    Another thing that bugged me was how easy it was for Dez to give up her addiction, and for Chance to give up his. Neither had a relapse during the book. We didn’t see Dez go though withdrawals only a little bit in the beginning. We didn’t see her struggle with her cravings and such. I felt like even though she was mentally wanting to be sober, having some habits and setbacks would be normal. You can’t even wean off like that and not feel something.

    Another thing that was never addressed is why her mom abandoned her. Like because she was an addict? We don’t hear anything about her mom after the first few comments. Though there’s a scene with Chances mom, with whom he hasn’t spoken to much in over a year. And yet they get a scene of them kinda making up. Also based on that scene I kind of expected to see him mom and Dez meeting and how that goes.

    I also hope Jason gets a book of his own, I want his story. Jason is a side character that comes in later.

    This book does use derogatory terms when the harassment starts, has talks about rape and abuse. Definitely check out the TW, but we never actually read scenes of it happening. We are usually told by Dez herself in her own words what happened.

    I loved it, it was different and while I don’t know all the terms it was a fun read too. It was great seeing Dez’s growth. Can’t wait for more.
    One person found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on June 29, 2022
    There aren't words to express my joy in finding this book and then the series. It is so well written and I've never met more well-rounded developed characters! I'm in love with like four characters already lol. Thank you first for creating a book I couldn't put down, but second tackling such hard topics like rape and recovery from rape and kidnapping. And even though the tough topics are such a large focus of the story, they don't overshadow the amazing plot and characters! I've never read something so well done! As an avid reader of four books a week, I have alot of books I can compare this too, and you served to the top of the list!!! I can't wait to continue this journey with you!!! Thank you!
  • Reviewed in the United States on July 28, 2020
    I enjoyed what this book taught me about gamer culture. I also appreciated how the authors handled discussing the rape that occurred. They don’t give unnecessary details where we might experience second hand trauma but instead give us enough to understand and support the MC even more. The topic of addiction is handled well, not in a way that romanticized it or diminishes how hard it is. The story itself was intriguing. I’ve been in a bit of a rut with getting myself to read books like I want to read but there’s nothing I want to read until I started this one. Planning on getting the next, but a little worried it won’t be able to live up to how good this was! I think they generally did a good job of using context to clarify references that non-gamers wouldn’t get but having the kindle version where I could look up words or references really helped me get the most out of this book. 9/10 recommend! (tw: rape, physical abuse, drug addiction, sex addiction, maybe stalking)
    One person found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on January 12, 2021
    I love Auryn Hadley's writing, but was wary of starting this series. I am not the biggest fan of contemporary fiction. This being about the abuse that women take in the gaming world, to the extreme, I didn't know if I would like it.

    The characters make it worth the read. You should be warned that Dez has a very horrible assault at the start of the book, it is the catalyst for a lot of the character motivations throughout the series. Hadley and Cox do not glorify the event or go into specific detail, but it could trigger some who have had similar experiences.

    The characters are all beautifuly dynamic and imperfect. They are real on a level that many are not. The find strength in things that others would never recover from, and the story just flows.

    From the discriptions of the game, I really wish that Silk was real. It sounds like it would be interesting to play.
  • Reviewed in the United States on June 20, 2024
    This entire series is amazing! I got absolutely absorbed into this book. Even though I've read through the series and know the outcome, I'm still so drawn into the story and characters. Re-reading the whole series again!

Top reviews from other countries

  • Lara
    5.0 out of 5 stars This may be the best book I've ever read
    Reviewed in Germany on August 2, 2024
    I really loved everything about this book. The whole series is absoloutely worth reading, but Flawed is my favourite. Even after three times reading it. Many apects of the story are pretty dark, but I still find it wholesome and heartwarming and I will definitely read it at least a fourth and a fifth time sometime.
  • Alyssa I.
    5.0 out of 5 stars Wow
    Reviewed in Canada on July 2, 2019
    I often shy away from writing reviews... However, when I find a book that I just cannot stop thinking about I just want to spread the word and tell everyone about how much I enjoyed it! Flawed was one of those books for me. I am so glad I picked this book up. I devoured it along with the other two books realeased thus far. I cannot wait for the next book and I am experiencing one of my biggest book hangovers.

    I enjoyed this book immensely and the series became a quick favourite for me. Auryn & Kitty created a captivating world, with realistic and relatable characters and even touched on topics that most authors tend to shy away from or barely even cover. The topics covered are very real topics and although shown thru a fictional world, the realities of what is shown and implied are still ultimately true. They did a fantastic job of creating characters you can relate to, and a world that was able to properly portray the hard topics it covered realistically. That being said, this book is definitely not for everyone. The trigger warnings are there for a reason and as the book is on the darker side, there were definitely parts that I found hard to read. Yet, despite the warnings I still found myself completely enthralled with not only the world and the storyline, but the characters. I loved how imperfect they all were. The characters are realistic because of their flaws, they’re relatable because of their struggles & triumphs, and they’re memorable because they’re "flawed".

    "None of us are perfect. No matter how hard we try, that is a goal which will always stay just out of reach. It's ok. It doesn't matter what you suffered through, the journey was yours, and it made you who you are today. Stop fighting it. No character ever became memorable because of an easy life. The best ones are forged with pain, anguish, and broken dreams. Embrace it. Be proud of it. We are all Flawed – and we are not alone."
  • B Funch
    5.0 out of 5 stars Gamers girls is goood!
    Reviewed in France on October 26, 2020
    Very nice book to read.
    I enjoy how there always is an underlying theme or message in her stories . Here it's that we are all flawed and it makes us better.
  • MADEUPgroup
    5.0 out of 5 stars ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on May 2, 2020
    This was an absolutely AMAZING story right from the get go and there’s SO MUCH that I want to say, but I’m going ti say a lot less than I would like on order to avoid spoilers for anybody. But EEEEK so difficult to do that because I want to rave about this so badly!

    First, despite having adored all previous books that I’ve read by Auryn, I’ve constantly put it off because as much as I love Auryns books... I have never been a gamer. Like ever. Zero interest. So... I wasn’t particularly motivated to get invested in it, and add in that this is a co-write, I wasn’t sure how well I would love something that was done with another person, would I still enjoy the style? Would I get on with any changes? Would there even be changes?

    But, despite all of this I had seen many Auryn fans trying to convince me that I needed to get stuck in, so yesterday I took the plunge.

    I decided to get started... and WOW. I read 80% in one day 🙈

    Actually, I LOVE this just as much as other books from Auryn, maybe more in some ways, and for a first tangle with Kitty as an author this is ASTOUNDING! The flair for the unexpected is there, the easy style of writing that makes it effortless to read but still manages to drag a variety of emotions and keep you glued from page to page...? All still there.

    When I say I’m not a gamer? I meant I have NEVER in my life held much interest in consoles. I played a couple PC games but stuck to the one at a time. the last console I bothered with was a ps2 for the ps1 games... and I still play them.

    I had a gamecube ONLY because it had bomberman, and i only bothered for a while when my brother got bored of it.

    So... you can see why I put it off, the series being about gamers? Didn’t really sound like the kind of story to hold my interest for very long, and i worried that I wouldn’t follow the terminology or even find it interesting generally.

    But I freakin LOVE the characters, I adore the premise, and actually the gameyness is done bloody cleverly. It’s done in a way that’s easy for me to follow and know what’s going on without spinning my head, but it will still resonate well with gamers.

    So.

    Yeh. Well done Auryn and Kitty Cox, I’m SOLD 😂🤷‍♀️ I will be happy diving into book 2 AS SOON as this review is posted. My family has already been told that once my daughter is asleep there’s a proverbial DO NOT DISTURB over my head.

    But, let’s return to Flawed for a bit before I get distracted 🤦‍♀️ There are still steamy scenes in this book, they’re surprisingly more tame, and yet oh so very not. There’s not much sex involved... but wow. Is it hot in here...?! These women don’t need to write a sex scene to have you hot under the collar! I bow to your skills ladies, because the way you did this was so CLEVER.

    Dealing with a main character who has been badly abused and turned to chemicals to cope, and creating a believable story of learning to love and trust, recover? Not an easy feat. So many have attempted a romance on a similar premise and wound up with a story that makes readers roll their eyes at how quickly and seemingly easily the victim overcomes all of their reservations when they find “the one”

    This isn’t what this story is about, it’s about learning to trust, coming to grips with who you are, and finding those people around you who can help you through it, having those who can and will understand, and taking the TIME to heal. The couple don’t suddenly mesh and all is well in the world, and the same is true of any around the main character.

    I loved the fact that this is a story based on people who don’t fit the magazine glossy image of “perfect”, all learning to work together and trust in different ways.

    There really isn’t much that I can say after that without telling you what will happen.

    But if you enjoy a realistic romance with surprises along the way, and a story that considers a variety of types of relationships rather than just romantic ones, as well as challenging a variety of social imbalances in a unique way, then you will ADORE this!
    Customer image
    MADEUPgroup
    5.0 out of 5 stars
    ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!

    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on May 2, 2020
    This was an absolutely AMAZING story right from the get go and there’s SO MUCH that I want to say, but I’m going ti say a lot less than I would like on order to avoid spoilers for anybody. But EEEEK so difficult to do that because I want to rave about this so badly!

    First, despite having adored all previous books that I’ve read by Auryn, I’ve constantly put it off because as much as I love Auryns books... I have never been a gamer. Like ever. Zero interest. So... I wasn’t particularly motivated to get invested in it, and add in that this is a co-write, I wasn’t sure how well I would love something that was done with another person, would I still enjoy the style? Would I get on with any changes? Would there even be changes?

    But, despite all of this I had seen many Auryn fans trying to convince me that I needed to get stuck in, so yesterday I took the plunge.

    I decided to get started... and WOW. I read 80% in one day 🙈

    Actually, I LOVE this just as much as other books from Auryn, maybe more in some ways, and for a first tangle with Kitty as an author this is ASTOUNDING! The flair for the unexpected is there, the easy style of writing that makes it effortless to read but still manages to drag a variety of emotions and keep you glued from page to page...? All still there.

    When I say I’m not a gamer? I meant I have NEVER in my life held much interest in consoles. I played a couple PC games but stuck to the one at a time. the last console I bothered with was a ps2 for the ps1 games... and I still play them.

    I had a gamecube ONLY because it had bomberman, and i only bothered for a while when my brother got bored of it.

    So... you can see why I put it off, the series being about gamers? Didn’t really sound like the kind of story to hold my interest for very long, and i worried that I wouldn’t follow the terminology or even find it interesting generally.

    But I freakin LOVE the characters, I adore the premise, and actually the gameyness is done bloody cleverly. It’s done in a way that’s easy for me to follow and know what’s going on without spinning my head, but it will still resonate well with gamers.

    So.

    Yeh. Well done Auryn and Kitty Cox, I’m SOLD 😂🤷‍♀️ I will be happy diving into book 2 AS SOON as this review is posted. My family has already been told that once my daughter is asleep there’s a proverbial DO NOT DISTURB over my head.

    But, let’s return to Flawed for a bit before I get distracted 🤦‍♀️ There are still steamy scenes in this book, they’re surprisingly more tame, and yet oh so very not. There’s not much sex involved... but wow. Is it hot in here...?! These women don’t need to write a sex scene to have you hot under the collar! I bow to your skills ladies, because the way you did this was so CLEVER.

    Dealing with a main character who has been badly abused and turned to chemicals to cope, and creating a believable story of learning to love and trust, recover? Not an easy feat. So many have attempted a romance on a similar premise and wound up with a story that makes readers roll their eyes at how quickly and seemingly easily the victim overcomes all of their reservations when they find “the one”

    This isn’t what this story is about, it’s about learning to trust, coming to grips with who you are, and finding those people around you who can help you through it, having those who can and will understand, and taking the TIME to heal. The couple don’t suddenly mesh and all is well in the world, and the same is true of any around the main character.

    I loved the fact that this is a story based on people who don’t fit the magazine glossy image of “perfect”, all learning to work together and trust in different ways.

    There really isn’t much that I can say after that without telling you what will happen.

    But if you enjoy a realistic romance with surprises along the way, and a story that considers a variety of types of relationships rather than just romantic ones, as well as challenging a variety of social imbalances in a unique way, then you will ADORE this!
    Images in this review
    Customer image
  • Ollie_Creates
    5.0 out of 5 stars A book like no other!
    Reviewed in Australia on May 6, 2024
    This was amazing! The writers took a very sensitive subject and treated it with such thorough care. Loved both Chance and Dez, loved that they were both flawed and helped each other to overcome and heal their issues, loved all the side characters!
    Definitely recommend this book!

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